Long weekend? How about the hospital?

I am typing this post one handed.

I've been on a real biking kick lately and I usually ride 2 to 3 times a week with Tony. Jeff has moved back to town and we've added him to the mix.

Thursday, we're going to meet Jeff at the Bridgeland LRT. I'm feeling pretty pleased with myself since my biking ensemble is appropriate for the weather. Usually I'm over dressed or under dressed, but the long sleeved shirt, windbreaker and shorts are working great.

Tony says we should take 1 St. which passes under the railroad; downhill one side and up the other. He's been really good at slowly easing me into traffic and I wasn't worried. We start our descent when Tony notices there's traffic and it's not pleasant to get stuck at the bottom and slows down to ride on the sidewalk. I, however do not notice and our tires rub.

I'm not sure what happened but I fall over. In a bid to fight the inevitable I stick my left arm out behind me and land right on it. I shout "Tony!" and thankfully he hears me over traffic and a very nice passer-by helps me off the street.

I'm in no condition to walk and looking at my elbow there are definitely lumps where there shouldn't be. Tony calls an ambulance and we sit in front of Bill's. I really am thirsty at this point; it really sucked sitting in front of Bill's. I'm feeling light-headed although it could be the car exhaust.

Ambulance arrives and they hustle me in. They take some vitals and offer me hits of NO (laughing gas) to dull the pain. It doesn't work great but it was fun to huff on it. And my shirt! They had to cut the sleeve so now I have a nice-sort-sleeved shirt once I get the other sleeve to match.

We go to the Sheldon Chumir Centre which just opened. It's a lot nicer than their former digs at 8&8. Go through the processing and am left to wait. The only person of interest to look at is a prisoner in full leg and arm chains, white booties, and two cops.

Go to X-rays where I start crying like a baby because it hurts so much to move it. X-rays are done but the radiologist never offered me a lead shield. I'm hoping future babies have cool mutant powers.

The orthopedic consult on duty tells me I've dislocated my lower two bones but they'll try to fix it. I then question their use of the word "try". Another doctor comes in and introduces herself as Dr. Tran and I snicker a little. The docs prep me with some drugs that will sedate me and make me forget. They also gave instructions to Daorcey as he was waiting outside of the room. I may cry out for help but don't come in. Daorcey also reports hearing a snap and then giggles. I can neither confirm nor deny.

I come to and their "try" did not work so I'm whisked off to the Rockyview Hospital which we learned has a special nickname among the medical community. Just before I pass out again from the sedation, I apparently said "Now my fucking husband gets to ride the new bike." That scandalized people who routinely deal with other people's poo. I discover one of the doctors pulling on my arm also helped me out when I sprained my ankle. I promise not to see her again.

After, we head to Humptys where I eat the best BLT evar.

The arm is not sore now and I get the danged soft cast off tomorrow. I start physio on Friday with the same guy who helped me out with my ankle. On the upside we missed the mudslide in Golden and we played a ton of GTA. And my co-worker made me a great card that incorporated Comic Sans and a pink Hello Kitty bike.

I think for the July long weekend, I'll stay inside.

I have my X-ray a few lines below, if you're curious. The autograph at the bottom is from my ortho consult. He said it would be worth more with it.